Absolute Moral Authority

Because plain old moral authority just wasn’t good enough — a mesablue production

Cat poo-tea

Posted by mesablue on January 19, 2007

If you spend any time at Ace of Spades HQ, you’ll learn about a little fixation a few of the more twisted folks have with cat scat.

I was surprised to find an article in the Chicago Tribune by columnist John Kass about a particular delicacy.

Coffee that’s good to the last dropping

In the post-apocalyptic nightmare to come, I hope somebody saves a copy of this column, to put the blame for the fall of the West right where it belongs: on America’s gourmet coffee fetish, which has led to $10 cups of coffee made from cat poop.

“It doesn’t taste like what you think it tastes like,” Brian Munro, manager and apprentice roast master at Coffee and Tea Unlimited in Minneapolis, said on Wednesday. “And it doesn’t smell. You smell the roasted beans. It’s a very rich cup of coffee. Using a coffee term, it’s got a full body.”

Yes, indeed, Mr. Brew Master.

“It’s roast master, not brew master,” he corrected. “I’m apprentice to the roast master.”

They are not cats, exactly, they’re civets, which is worse. A civet is a 10-pound cat with soft, pudgy hands. They creep through Indonesian and Ethiopian coffee fields at night, eating the fruit, swallowing the beans, as hapless peasants trudge behind them, gingerly collecting the undigested beans, perhaps singing a folk song or two about stupid North Americans, and ship them here, where it sells for $420 a pound.

Holy crap.

7 Responses to “Cat poo-tea”

  1. cranky said

    …apprentice roast master

    This dude is taking up where Dean Martin left off? What a career path.

  2. Wickedpinto said

    superbowl shuff was recorded before the 5th game of the season I think.

    I’m just saying this cuz there is a shitty political connection, but I love how EAGER Fencik is in the video, but completely uncoordinated.

    I’m not lying about the bears this week, it will be either close or a blowout (depending on the defense, and grossman’s turnovers) but I love remember the 85 bears, the BEST TEAM TO EVER TAKE THE FIELD! That is OBVIOUS! The 85 bears were the most dominant team to ever take the field.

  3. cranky said

    Good luck Bears fans. Watch out for Bush, he is a special player in much the same way Payton was. He’s not Walter Payton but he is clearly very, very talented.

  4. JVD said

    Inadequate preparation of Palm Civet meat is the suspect for the worldwide spread of the SARS outbreak in 2003.
    Walter Payton was a great player and an excellent duck hunter.

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