Absolute Moral Authority

Because plain old moral authority just wasn’t good enough — a mesablue production

Archive for March, 2007

You smell like eggs

Posted by mesablue on March 31, 2007

That’s Ok, because I smell like bacon. Or, I will once I gets me one of these:

Bacon Scented Tuxedo

There’s a theory that everything is better with bacon. We believe that theory with all of our heart. To that end, we are introducing our line of bacon formal wear with Uncle Oinker’s Bacon Scented Bacon Print Tuxedo. You can get married in bacon, get confirmed in bacon or go to the Oscars in bacon! Wait until Joan Rivers gets a whiff of you. Each Tuxedo is tailored from chemically treated latex print fabric in one of four different sizes. Best of all, it smells just like bacon sizzling in the pan.

Dry clean only.

Awesome! It’s only ninety nine bucks.

h/t Amish made me do it.

Posted in cool, funny, weird | 4 Comments »

Those were the good old days…

Posted by mesablue on March 29, 2007


No matter what you think about the guy, he sure can deliver a joke.

President Bush last night at the Radio and Television Correspondents Dinner:

Seen first at Hot Air.

A classic Reagan moment pointed out by Amish:

Posted in funny, politics, video | 4 Comments »

What Ace was doing today…

Posted by mesablue on March 28, 2007

Lightning Bolt!

No, it’s not old. It’s ancient.

Posted in blogs, video, weird | 2 Comments »

More weird news from Michigan #238

Posted by mesablue on March 28, 2007

Officials ponder disappearance of 15M gallons of sewage

SAND LAKE, Mich. (AP) — About 15 million gallons of partially treated sewage water disappeared from a 250,000 square-foot storage lagoon into a sinkhole, but officials don’t know where it went after that.

Kent County utility operator Nathan Danenberg, who runs the sewage treatment system for Sand Lake, discovered the leak in the 8-foot-deep lagoon on Friday while taking samples. It wasn’t clear when or why the leak occurred.

“I don’t know if maybe there are old mines in the area,” Danenberg told The Grand Rapids Press for a story published Tuesday.

“It’s an odd case. A sinkhole gobbled up all the water and we don’t know where it went… It seems to have just gone down into the earth.

“We don’t smell anything and we don’t see anything.”

Well then, everything must be just fine.

Remind me to stay away from Sand Lake for about ten years.

Posted in news, weird | 1 Comment »

More weird news from Michigan #237

Posted by mesablue on March 28, 2007

Yeah, this’ll turn things around:

Stephen Colbert gets honorary post as Saginaw County tourism booster

SAGINAW — Satirical late-night pundit Stephen Colbert has earned a spot as a Saginaw County tourism booster — and with it a lifetime pass for a trail system that’s free to the public.

The county’s Board of Commissioners voted Tuesday to put Colbert, whose antics have included an obsession with the Saginaw Spirit minor league hockey team, on the Saginaw County Convention and Visitors Bureau’s board, The Saginaw News reported.

The host of “The Colbert Report” on Comedy Central becomes an honorary member of the board, “with all the rights and privileges associated with the position, including a lifetime pass to the Rail Trail,” a proclamation read.

The Saginaw Valley Rail Trail, a county park, covers 9.2 miles of abandoned rail corridor from St. Charles to Saginaw. It’s used for walking, running, horseback riding, cross-country skiing and bike rides.

Last year, the Spirit named its mascot Steagle Colbeagle the Eagle as a tribute to Colbert. His attention to the Spirit on his show has boosted demand for the Ontario Hockey League team’s paraphernalia.

Posted in news, weird | Leave a Comment »

A solution to the Iran hostage crisis

Posted by mesablue on March 27, 2007

Cheney allegedly offers to trade Carter for hostages

March 25, 2007
Cheney Allegedly Offers to Trade Carter for Hostages
by Scott Ott

(2007-03-25) — A source close to Dick Cheney said today that the vice president has suggested freeing 15 British sailors and marines from Iranian captivity by trading former President Jimmy Carter for the hostages.

Go read the rest…

Posted in blogs, funny, Iran, news | 1 Comment »

Uh, John?

Posted by mesablue on March 27, 2007


That’s what you get for hotlinking.

At TechCrunch:

Someone on Presidential hopeful John McCain’s staff is going to be in trouble today. They used a well known template to create his Myspace page. The template was designed by Newsvine Founder and CEO Mike Davidson (original template is here). Davidson gave the template code away to anyone who wanted to use it, but asked that he be given credit when it was used, and told users to host their own image files.

McCain’s staff used his template, but didn’t give Davidson credit. Worse, he says, they use images that are on his server, meaning he has to pay for the bandwidth used from page views on McCain’s site.

Davidson decided to play a small prank on the campaign this morning as retribution. Since he’s in control of some of the images on the site, he replaced one that shows contact information with a statement:

Today I anounce that I have reversed my position and come out in full support of gay mariage…particularly marriage between two passionate females.

Found via Allah, of course.

Posted in blogs, funny, politics, stupid people | Leave a Comment »

Horrible news

Posted by mesablue on March 27, 2007

Tony Snow’s cancer has returned

Via Wizbang:

WASHINGTON (AP) – Presidential spokesman Tony Snow’s surgery to remove a small growth showed that his cancer has returned, the White House said Tuesday.

Snow, 51, had his colon removed in 2005 and underwent six months of chemotherapy after being diagnosed with colon cancer. A small growth was discovered last year in his lower right pelvic area, and it was removed on Monday. Doctors determined that it was cancerous, and that his cancer had metastized, or spread, to his liver, White House spokeswoman Dana Perino said.

She said Snow is resting comfortably after his surgery and has pledged to aggressively fight the disease with an as-yet-to-be-determined treatment course.

“He said he’s going to beat it again,” Perino said in an emotional morning briefing with White House reporters. “When I talked to him, he was in very good spirits.”

Really bad news. Tony Snow is a great guy. I really liked his work as a news anchor and radio talk show host, I love him as White House Press Secretary. It has been a long time since someone spoke truth to stupid the way Tony does.

It sickens me that most of the left side of the blogosphere will be cheering this news and wishing Tony a painful death — the peace lovers are a hateful bunch.

Please include Tony Snow in your thoughts and prayers.

Posted in news | Leave a Comment »

The liberal blogger

Posted by mesablue on March 27, 2007

Captured in it’s natural habitat:

Thanks to Lisa.

Posted in blogs, funny, moonbats, stupid people | 2 Comments »

Ah, Spain….

Posted by mesablue on March 26, 2007

This is awesome.

Victim wears Mohammad bomb cartoon to Madrid trial

MADRID (Reuters) – A woman who lost her husband in the 2004 Madrid train bombings displayed an infamous cartoon mocking the Prophet Mohammad on her T-shirt in front of 29, mostly Muslim, suspects on trial for the attacks on Monday.

The woman’s white T-shirt showed Mohammad wearing a bomb as a turban — one of a series published by Danish newspaper Jyllands-Posten which unleashed violent protests by some Muslims last year.

Ten bombs ripped through four commuter trains on March 11, 2004, killing 191 people — attacks which public prosecutors blame on a group of Islamist militants inspired by al-Qaeda.

The woman sat in the front row of the court wearing the T-shirt for around half-an-hour before getting up, walking up to the glass cage containing the defendants and finally walking out of the court, judicial sources said.

Good for her.

Of course, this would never be allowed in a courtroom here in the land of the free and the home of the brave.

We get Code Pinko’s and Impeach Bush transvestites.

And, lest anyone get their panties in a bunch, this is a terror trial in which 29 terrorists are on trial for using Islam as an excuse to slaughter innocent civilians whom they considered infidels, to make a political point. When the cartoons were first published, no on really cared — it was an exercise in irony. Then, a couple of imams created their own versions of the cartoons, added them to the rest and then went on a little terrorist/riot incitement trip in which dozens of people were killed including a Catholic priest and a nun — tens of thousands rioted. It later turned out that the imams had taken an image from a French hog calling festival with a man calling a hog with a pig nose on his face and passed it off as one of the original cartoons — which it was clearly not.

Religion of peace, indeed. It’s long past time for moderate Muslims to stand up and separate themselves from the “small amount” of their society that deals in terror and murder.

Muslims have carried out over 7835 terror attacks worldwide SINCE 9/11. (see my sidebar)

One woman in Spain has more courage than all of the governments in the world.

From Hot Air

Also Moosetracked at that thief’s blog.

Posted in cool, Islam, moonbats, moral authority, Muslims, news, politics | 4 Comments »

I’ll give you ten bucks…

Posted by mesablue on March 26, 2007

If you can tell me what the heck this cat is doing.

Found because of this goofy post about a cat that can say it’s own name — at Weasel dudes place.

And yes, I know it’s cat blogging, which is instant death to any blog. It was just weird enough to be included here.

Posted in blogs, funny, PETA, video, weird | 6 Comments »

Crocodile bomber?

Posted by mesablue on March 26, 2007

This is weird, a woman causes panic at the border crossing between Egypt and Gaza — notice how they just call it Gaza.

Woman Has Crocodiles Strapped to Body

JERUSALEM — A woman with three crocodiles strapped to her waist was stopped at the Gaza-Egypt border crossing after guards noticed that she looked “strangely fat,” officials said Monday.

The woman’s shape raised suspicions at the Rafah terminal in southern Gaza, and a body search by a female border guard turned up the animals, each about 20 inches long, concealed underneath her loose robe, according to Maria Telleria, spokeswoman for the European observers who run the crossing.

The woman looked strangely fat. Even though she was veiled and covered, even with so many clothes on there was something strange,” Telleria said.

The incident, which took place on Thursday, sparked panic at the crossing.

“The policewoman screamed and ran out of the room, and then women began screaming and panicking when they heard,” Telleria said. But when the hysteria died down, she said, “everybody was admiring a woman who is able to tie crocodiles to her body.”

“Admiring a woman who is able to tie crocodiles to her body?” As opposed to what?

What do Palestinians want with exotic animals?

The woman was not the first to try to smuggle exotic wildlife through the Rafah crossing, Dahab said: Another woman tried to bring in a monkey tied to her chest, and other travelers tried to smuggle in exotic birds and a tiger cub.

Strange people.

Update: Heh, I actually found something before Allah.

Posted in news, PETA, weird | 2 Comments »

Khalid Sheikh O’Donnell

Posted by mesablue on March 23, 2007

For Rosetta…

Kudos to this dude.

Posted in al-Qaeda, funny, moonbats, sexy | 11 Comments »

Mmmmm, polar bear!

Posted by mesablue on March 23, 2007

Since the goofy animal rights activists in Germany want to kill this cute little bugger because he is being “tainted” by human contact, we might as well get something good out of it.

Roast polar bear

Yield: 8 Servings
1 5 to 6 pound roast of bear
½ cup Vinegar
1 tablespoon Salt
4 cup Water
3 Strips thick sliced bacon or salt pork
1 Large onion, quartered
3 tablespoon Butter
1 teaspoon Salt
¼ teaspoon Pepper

Trim all fat from the roast. Wash well Soak meat for at least 2 hours in water, salt and vinegar. Remove and pat dry. Place meat in a roaster, lay strips of bacon on top and place quarters of onion beside it. Roast at 35O degrees F. for about 3 hours. 15 minutes before serving, remove bacon strips, coat top of roast with butter and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Roast another 15 minutes and drizzle butter on top two or three times during this period. Serve Hot. Serves 6 to 8. From _Northern Cookbook_ edited by Eleanor A. Ellis, Information Canada 1973.

I was also thinking that slow smoking the cub could be REALLY tasty.

Stupid animal “lovers”. Kinda reminds me of the “peace” activists.

What is wrong with these people?

Posted in Bears, food, moonbats, moral authority, PETA, stupid people | 11 Comments »

Mmmmm, bacon!

Posted by mesablue on March 23, 2007

This kid likes his pork chops REALLY rare.

Or — Mmmmm, pig snot!

Found at Cute Overload via that Weasel guy.

Fridays are now officially “Lick a Pig Day”. Send in your pics.

Posted in food, funny | 5 Comments »


Posted by mesablue on March 23, 2007

I’m still new to this blogging thing. Three months.

It’s pretty fun, a little time consuming. But, I felt a responsibility to at least throw some of my thoughts out there if I was going to keep commenting and voicing my opinion on other’s blogs.

Welcome to the dark and dirty world of blog admin.

The dashboard can be an addiction at first. Do I get hits? Who’s visiting and why?

Then you see the search results that brought people to your site.

Kinda scary.

Just from the last two days so there is a little overlap:

cat poo coffee pig
moo and oink theme
january 21, 2007 fatal accident detroit
“support our troops”
deep fried beer bacon wrapped cheese dog
deep fried bacon wrapped cheese dog
muslim sources of moral authority
moral authority islam
cost of canned monkey meat
mullah cimoc march 2007 4
“is gone. And as soon” 3
bacon cheese hot dog deep fried 2
viet nam animal rape
abandoned Detroit
bacon cheese deep fried hot dog
Michigan attempted breaking and entering
deep fried hot dog
cat poo
hamster cardboard tube
responses to Mount St Helens
pig fucker love
fried hot dog cheese bacon
moo cow vegetable
i hate you
sentient burger
bart is gay
chicken shoot
batman buttsex
fry my weenie
hobo pizza fuck

Ok,. I’m getting tired of pulling off the number of hits.

moralauthority.wordpress.com 6
terrapass 3
facts about global warming faults? 3
i hate authority 2
eid al walid 2007 2
hate comcast 2
beer funnel ass 1
mullah cimoc march 2007 2
bacon wrapped deep fried cheese dog 2
moral authority 2
beer cheese dog 2
possum in ass 2
fried bacon 2
“The Great Global Warming Scandal” youtu 4
i hate comcast 3
chicken sex boy 2
old shellalagh detroit 3
deep fried bacon 3
detroit “seven mile” lebanese heads 3
moralauthority.wordpress.com 3
deep fried hot dogs bacon cheese 1
cimoc production 1
finger texas dave pool 1
small monkey fun shit 1
co2 lag temperature “global warming 1
bacon wrapped deep fried cheese hot dogs 1
absolute moral mesablue 1
slimy poodle ass 1
stupid people crimes 1
send my shit to Idaho 1
global warming interesting title 1
pepper rabbit fun explode 1
“CO2 concentration” “atmosphere” 2007 1
bacon cheese fried hot dogs 1
small dog sex 1
arabic stores in detroit area 1
edge detroit strip club 1
The pictures that got Miss Nevada dethro 1
super stat futur Beirut Lebanon 1
funny cat pics 1
scary dead animal pics 1
“indoctrinate u” thoughts 1
leonardo dicaprio 1
hotdog, bacon, cheese 1
bacon cheese deep-fried hot dog 1
comcast hate site 1
butts are pretty 1
contribution of volcanoes of CO2 1
irina absolut skinny 1
snausages SOUND BITE 1
authority hate 1
great global warming scandal 1
comcast “cranky” commercial 1
real news, stupid people, stupid stunt 1
picture of restaurant front 1
charlie brown celebrates ramadan 1
Major Religions in lebanon 1
why bush is anty global warming 1
crimes found on facebook 1
my cat hates you 1
global warming contribution of co2 1
Britain’s Channel documentary “The Great 1
crab cake 1
youtube global warming scandal 1
hot dogs higher authority 1
fredericksburg islam halal 1
deep fried bacon wrapped hot dog 1
hot dog wrapped in bacon 1
culture of East Dearborn versus West Dea 1
global seed fault 1
indoctrinate you 1
“lego factory” +texas 1
=where you can be of moral support to yo 1

I put up a bunch of posts that I hope will have enough content that at least a few people will want to visit again.

If you look at the search results, if I want a successful blog, all I have to do is write about deep fried bacon and cheese hot dogs — and animal sex and I’ll get thousands of hits.

I did write about deep fried hot dogs and berserk donkeys and super rabbits.

Just didn’t think it would be judged as my best work by the blog surfers.

I think it’s time to change the name of the blog to — Absolute Deep Fried Moral Cheese Donkeys and Hot Super Rabbit Dogs.

Whadya think?

And, Leonardo DiCaprio?

I know I didn’t write a single thing about that little pussbag.

Though, he didn’t completely suck in Departed — he is just not at all believable as a tough guy. Richard Simmons could kick his ass on a bad hangover day — after sweatin’ with the oldies in a pile of seventy year old baby oiled man flesh.

Great, what kind of hits am I going to get after that sentence?

And, to those of you that actually know me in person — I haven’t completely lost it. The search results are all true, some of the rest is an inside joke.

Spurwing, buddy — need your help here.

Posted in blogs, cool, moral authority, sexy, weird | 9 Comments »

Detroit: the worst place on earth

Posted by mesablue on March 22, 2007

So says Ace:

Detroit: the worst place on earth

I’m sorry, but this is just depressing. There’s no nice way to put it. Detroit is bad and getting worse and it’s hard to argue otherwise when homes are now selling for less than the average car.

With. No. Takers.

From the article he links:

With bidding stalled on some of the least desirable residences in Detroit’s collapsing housing market, even the fast-talking auctioneer was feeling the stress.
“Folks, the ground underneath the house goes with it. You do know that, right?” he offered.

After selling house after house in the Motor City for less than the $29,000 it costs to buy the average new car, the auctioneer tried a new line: “The lumber in the house is worth more than that!”

As Detroit reels from job losses in the U.S. auto industry, the depressed city has emerged as a boomtown in one area: foreclosed property.

The city, which has lost more than half its population in the past 30 years and struggled with rising crime, failing schools and other social problems, largely missed out on the housing boom that swept much of the country in recent years.

Prices have gained less than 2 percent per year in the five years since 2001, when the auto industry entered a renewed slump.

Steve Izairi, 32, who re-financed his own house in suburban Dearborn and sold his restaurant to begin buying rental properties in Detroit two years, was concerned that houses he thought were bargains at $70,000 two years ago were now selling for just $35,000.

At least 16 Detroit houses up for sale on Sunday sold for $30,000 or less.

A boarded-up bungalow on the city’s west side brought $1,300. A four-bedroom house near the original Motown recording studio sold for $7,000.

“You can’t buy a used car for that,” said Izairi. “It’s a gamble, and you have to wonder how low it’s going to get.”

Detroit, where unemployment runs near 14 percent and a third of the population lives in poverty, leads the nation in new foreclosure filings, according to tracking service RealtyTrac.

With large swaths of the city now abandoned, banks are reclaiming and reselling Detroit homes from buyers who can no longer afford payments at seven times the national rate.

Can’t say that I disagree with Ace.

As soon as child number two makes it to college — three years — I’m out of here. Either back to Chicago or to someplace warm. Someplace that has an economy that isn’t as dismally depressing as it is here in Detroit. Basically, anywhere but here.

Check out this interesting site: The Fabulous Ruins of Detroit

Posted in detroit, news | 187 Comments »

Meanwhile, here in Michigan….

Posted by mesablue on March 21, 2007

I didn’t plan another post about “peaceful” anti-war types so soon. It’s not hard to find moonbatiness on a daily basis — it can get tedious. There’s just too much material and my blog is not titled Old Smelly 60’s Rejects and their Retarded Spawn.

But, this one is close to home.

Mich. Congressman’s Office Vandalized

Vandals Litter Michigan Congressman Mike Rogers’ Office With Anti-War Sentiments

AP) Vandals upset over the Iraq war defaced U.S. Rep. Mike Rogers’ office overnight, a spokesman said Tuesday.

The unknown individuals splattered red paint on the Lansing building and put up a sign saying the Republican has “blood” on his hands. They also spray painted the sidewalk with the words “no more deaths,” glued shut the front door of the building and destroyed security cameras, said Andy Keiser, Rogers’ chief of staff.

Sheriff’s deputies were providing extra security at the Brighton home where Rogers lives with his wife and two children, Keiser said.

“The aggressive destruction of federal property and vandalism was a callous attempt to intimidate Congressman Rogers and his staff,” he said in a statement. “We all are entitled to our own opinion on the situation in Iraq, but we are not entitled to destruction of taxpayer property and intimidation of federal officials.”

The FBI, U.S. Capitol police and Lansing police were investigating.

Rogers has supported President Bush’s decision to pursue the war in Iraq four years ago but has opposed Bush’s recent plan to send extra troops to Baghdad.

Stupid moonbats. Read the last sentence above, they went after the wrong guy.

Rogers opposes the troop increase.

These idiots must not have gotten this weeks talking points/marching orders. All they know is Republican — evil, Bush — Hitler.

I was in Lansing yesterday and narrowly avoided hitting a herd of hippies that ran out into the street in some sort of addled daze. Maybe I shouldn’t have tried so hard to miss them. Hippies tend to be soft and mushy, the damage to my truck would have been minimal.

Nah. I never would have been able to get the smell off.

Update: A round-up of events including this one at Hot Air

And this one:

Moonbats Spread Feces in Army Recruiting Office

Milwaukee moonbats have exhibited their patriotism by attacking an Army recruiting center. Unsurprisingly the bold assault took place around 8 PM, when there would be no one inside.

Moonbats shattered the window and spread human waste around the office, to the proud delight of the Indymedia cesspool.

At least they found these morons.

Frontpage Milwaukee confirms UWM students arrested in recruiting center incident

Update: There are now two, and possibly three, UWM students confirmed. See the link below. Frontpage Milwaukee also has links to their facebook sites and is naming them now that police say they have been cited. The UWM spokesman says he is not sure what the university will do – if anything

Posted in moonbats, moral authority, news, politics, stupid people | 1 Comment »

More “patriots” at work

Posted by mesablue on March 20, 2007

Continuing on a theme.

Zombie has done excellent work once again capturing moonbat patriotism in San Fransisco this weekend.

There’s really not much that has to be said. I’ll let the pictures speak for themselves.

Some are more confused than others

And, to provide balance and show that all moonbats are not aging hippies

Now, she knows how to protest.

All pictures are by Zombie, head over to Zombietime to see the rest.

H/t to Ace

Posted in moonbats, moral authority, politics, stupid people | 4 Comments »

Yeah, they support our troops — not!

Posted by mesablue on March 20, 2007

I get really tired of hearing lefties say that they support our troops but don’t support their mission. Ask any soldier, Marine, sailor or airman how they feel about that. It also emboldens the enemy — something that leftards can’t seem to wrap their mind about.

Reasonable dissent is one thing, continous bleating and blame throwing end up crossing many lines. Leftie war protestors always make a point of saying that they are patriotic — it drives them nuts if you question their patriotism.

So, when did patriotism translate into such hatred for America?

At LGFLeftists supporting the troops.

Here we have lefties supporting our troops in Portland just the other day — by burning them in effigy along with the American flag.

Just in case that doesn’t get the point across and you need a little clarification as to their true feelings.

Fuck the troops?

Fuck them.

Those little weasels wouldn’t have to guts to stand up for their own freedom in a real world situation. They can only express themselves so disgustingly because of the heroic actions of those they disdain.

Can we question their patriotism now?

Hell yes. These people don’t care about anything but their own selfish concerns. I’m ashamed to share the same country with them. Try that crap anywhere else in the world and the very least of their worries would be dodging water cannons and tear gas. Here, they can just go on their merry way.

Only, because of the efforts and sacrifice of millions before them who put the needs of their families, neighbors, towns, cities and country ahead of their own can scum like this exist unaccosted in our society.


Posted in military, moonbats, moral authority, news, politics, stupid people | 8 Comments »